Things Brett Favre can do to occupy himself

It has occurred to me that Brett Favre just doesn't have a lot to do with himself without standing in front of camera's and microphones yelling "Look at me! I'm a selfish, spiteful ex-hero that isn't getting his rear end kissed enough!"

Being the compassionate, loving guy I am, I really want to help Brett out, so here are some suggestions:

Count your money
This could actually be fun and amazingly time consuming. It can also give a warm feeling of self worth to know how rich you've become, sliding through a college education most had to pay for and playing a kids game for your entire life. Or sliding on a pair of jeans and playing catch with a bunch of models that probably had to be hospitalized after catching your passes.

Hold something else hostage rather than the Green Bay Packers future
Maybe it's just that rush of dangerous excitement you miss, like trying to avoid Michael Strahan for three hours in the old days.
Why not try robbing a bank, or taking hostages? I mean you have experience there. The last five years of your career in Green Bay you held the franchise hostage, refusing to tell them if you were retiring or not until the draft had passed and they had kissed your behind sufficiently.
One warning, if somebody calls your bluff here you end up in jail, not with the Jets...come to think of it that really is kind of similar.

Along those lines, spend some time with Michael Strahan
There's an all time great, one of the very few in any sport, who got it right...quit while you're on top, before your skills diminish and people remember you as a bitter, washed up, has been who couldn't walk away. Kind of like...well...

SPEND SOME TIME WITH YOUR FAMILY!!

Get a part time job
I'm thinking greeter at Wal-Mart, maybe?

Find a cure for Swine Flu
That would get you back in the headlines.

Win your local Fantasy Football league
That would show them that not only should you still be quarterback, but you also should have been GM for all those years too.

Sit in front of your TV and drink beer on Sunday like the rest of us
It's really not that bad a way to go. Invite a few friends over and talk about how you would have done it when you played. It's what we all do.

Or better still, keep hanging on
I'm a Bear fan, man. I'm actually kind of enjoying this in a twisted sort of way.